Speaking to numerous people, I realize that this is a very little known phenomenon in my part of the world. I had no idea that there was such a thing as a quarter-life crisis until I met my good friend Kate, who was also one of the key people who gave me the opportunity to attend Bucknell University.
When she first explained it to me, I gave the same reaction every one else now gives me when I bring it up. An initial chuckle, followed by a smile that says, "Indulge me", as if the next few sentences that we were about to hear would be absurd and utter nonsense. I have briefly mentioned the quarter-life crisis before (here and here), but I never really talked about what it really is.
The link I gave above puts it quite accurately. Here it is again, with some extract:
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.
You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.Kate told me that she had wished someone had explained this to her when she was around my age back then. We had this conversation back in 2008, during my final year at Bucknell. I was also in the midst of transitioning from college, and wandering aimlessly into adulthood, which is better known in these parts of the world as "the working life".
Now, five years later and two-cents wiser, I think I am in a better position to connect the dots, as Steve Jobs would put it. To many of us, it is many of his innovations like the iPod, iPhone or iPad that changed our lives. To me, it is none of that. I don't find any of those products any more revolutionary than the next portable electronic device. To say that smartphones would not have been invented if not for Steve Jobs would be committing a non sequitur fallacy.
To me, Steve changed my life with "Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish". It was the core motivating factor that helped me get past my quarter-life crisis.
So, in connecting the dots five difficult years later, I still don't see a paradigm shift.
And my only regret was that I had not discover this blog sooner:
Penelope Trunk
An even bigger regret is that I did not share it sooner. It is quite safe to say that it is one of my all-time favorite reads. Here are some potentially life-altering highlights:
Living Up To Your Potential
How To Know What To Look For
Co-Workers Change Your Life
Stop Thinking You'll Get By On Your High IQ
Career Change Looks Like Halloween
Initially, I had intended to summarize each post but then I just read through all of them and I realized that it would be a great injustice to each and every one of the posts and more importantly, an even greater injustice to all the readers who would have just read the summary and skipped the posts entirely.
So I have decided to meet you halfway and leave the rest to you. Good luck on your quarter-life crisis.
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